Dating is an ever-changing process. One day it’s great and you feel amazing, the next day things don’t look as positive and bright anymore.

Although it is a normal part of the journey, there are ways to help improve your dating experience.

One of them is through adopting conscious dating principles. Today together with Flure we dive deeper into mindfulness dating and how it influences us.

The Connection Between Mental Wellness and Dating

Mental wellness and dating are more intertwined than many think.

Our mental state dictates who we date, the decisions we make, and how we react to people’s words and actions.

When your mental health is doing well, you’re feeling more confident and emotionally stable, you’re more resilient, and you have clarity over what you want and don’t want in a relationship.

At the same time, your dating life also impacts your mental health. Dealing with a ghosting situation is certainly not good for your emotional well-being, and having a loving and caring partner by your side will certainly make you feel more at ease and less anxious, contributing to a better overall mental state.

When it comes to dating and mental health, small details play a role too. For instance, them complimenting you on a regular basis makes you happier and more confident, which in turn means you can navigate any daily issues better, without them ruining your mood.

And suppose your partner is not abusive or manipulative, but nags you every day about the little things. In that case, you’ll wake up one day realizing that you’re constantly angry, annoyed, and on edge, and will struggle to understand why.

Being mindful of your dating patterns and preferences and balancing your mental health will help you cultivate a healthy and sustainable relationship with yourself and with others.

Self-Care Practices for a Healthy Dating Life

Dating is one of the best experiences in the world, but it does have many ups and downs. If you’d like to protect your mental peace and only have positive romantic experiences, then you need to implement certain strategies and practices into your lifestyle.

Establish healthy boundaries

Having boundaries is an absolute must. If you’ve never done this before, spend some time analyzing your past relationships and reflecting overall.

What are some of the unacceptable things? What do you expect from a relationship?

Knowing what your preferences and limitations are, along with the ability to communicate them clearly will make your dating life so much better.

Side note, if you share your boundaries and have to make excuses for them or see them being disrespected, the person you’re seeing is most likely not a good fit for you.

Date because you want to

There are so many reasons why people start dating, and wanting to find a partner is not always their main goal.

Many of us deal with societal pressure and even have friends or relatives question whether everything’s okay with us if we’re single for too long.

The key to conscious dating that’s good for your soul is to only date when you actually want to do it and are looking forward to meeting someone cute.

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with not wanting to date and focusing on other areas of your life. Do it when you’re ready.

Embrace uncertainty

Manage your expectations to avoid dating burnout. Nobody is guaranteed to find a partner within a certain timeframe, and you need to be prepared for having to go on many dates before settling with the one.

Also, not every interaction has to lead somewhere. It’s fine if some people are not your cup of tea. Some Flure users manage to find friends and even job opportunities by matching with someone who’s not good for them romantically, but a great person overall.

So, don’t stress too much about the uncertainty and embrace the journey.

Slow down or pause

whenever you get overwhelmed. Healthy online dating is not only about being selective and respectful but also listening to your inner voice.

If you’re not enjoying the process of scrolling, matching, chatting, and going out anymore, simply don’t do it. You’re not obliged to date non-stop until the happy ending.

Take your time, close those dating apps and chats, and dedicate your days to something else. Once you feel like dating again, jump right back into it.

Love Yourself Before You Can Love Someone Else

As cheesy as it sounds, you do need to learn how to love yourself first. Prioritize your wants and needs, stop being a people pleaser, and do things that will make you better and happier.

Focus on self-care, but not the hot baths and sweet treats that you see on TikTok, but rather commit to building a healthy and happy life for yourself.

Budget and save to relieve yourself from constant financial worry, commit to a better diet and workout plan to be healthier and feel more energized, find the time for your hobbies and other activities that bring you joy, see your friends more often, and find the power to cut ties with those who are not good for you.

Mindfulness in Modern Dating

Modern dating is intense. It’s fast-paced and excessive, and if you’re not careful, you can easily get sucked into the madness. Your best bet for taking self-care in relationships is to focus on mindfulness.

Mindfulness in dating improves how you communicate with others and the emotional connections that you build with them. Here is what it entails:

• Being an active and attentive listener to understand the other person better. You’re not distracted when they’re talking to you, so you’re able to understand them better and build a strong emotional connection early on.
• Regulating your emotions like a pro and dealing with incoming situations with more grace. Instead of being frustrated and stressing yourself out over minor issues, you’ll be able to respond rather than react.
• Being more present in conversations and valuing everyday interactions and emotional intimacy, rather than hyper-fixating on the past events of possible future scenarios.
• Promoting vulnerability and authenticity means being more aware of your and your partner’s emotions and being able to express and process them without the fear of being misunderstood or ridiculed.
• Letting go of assumptions and learning not to jump to conclusions, but instead openly address anything and everything that you find weird or odd.

Recognizing Green and Red Flags

If you want to achieve mental wellness and love, then you have to be able to recognize and deal with green and red flags.

Green Flags in Dating

Green flags are the good signs and signals that someone is a perfect match for you. They will be different depending on your culture, the society you’re living in currently, and your personal dating goals.

• Consistent communication
• Respectful treatment
• Accountability
• Emotional awareness
• Mutual effort
• Mature conflict resolution
• Feeling secure by their side

Red Flags in Dating

Red flags are the warning signs that the relationship might not work out or not be good for you. Red flags should never be ignored because they don’t go away unless you do something about them.

If you ever notice your partner exhibiting any of the points below, make sure to speak up and try to resolve them together.

• Mixed signals
• Inconsistent communication and treatment
• Lack of respect for boundaries
• Fast-paced and intensive courting
• Avoidance of “real” conversations
• Disrespect toward others (anyone)
• Emotional manipulation
• Feeling drained or unsafe by their side

Important: Red flags can only be resolved if both people are interested in getting better. If you ever feel unsafe with your partner, feel free to walk away at any point.

It’s not your job to make them a better person or to stick with them no matter what. Always choose yourself first.

Managing Rejection and Maintaining Confidence

Rejection is a normal part of the dating experience. Conscious dating teaches us that being rejected by someone is not the end of the world and not a reason to feel angry, resentful, or shameful.

You wouldn’t want to end up with the wrong person and waste years on them only for the relationship to lead nowhere in the end, right? In that case, rejection is a blessing in disguise.

If the person doesn’t appreciate you or think that you’re a good fit for them, it’s good that they have the self-awareness and the courage to admit that, communicate their feelings, and move on.

Same with you. You should never feel bad about rejecting someone, given that you’re doing it elegantly and not trying to purposefully hurt them. The heart wants what it wants, and there’s absolutely no obligation to stay with someone you don’t like all that much.

How Flure Supports Healthy and Conscious Dating

If you want to build healthy and mindful relationships, you need to prioritize a dating app for meaningful connections. Not every dating app or website pays attention to mindfulness and emotional intelligence in dating, and that’s alright. You simply need to find a place that does.

Flure is a platform that focuses on matching people who fit each other the best and who will complement one another.

The vigorous algorithms analyze each profile and connect users with emotionally intelligent partners for a better chance of fostering meaningful relationships.

By helping users prioritize mental health and self-love before love, Flure helps more people find love and build sustainable romances that only enrich both partners’ lives.

Go to Flure’s blog to find out more about conscious dating principles and experiences.